The Origin of Geeses
India: Why is the egg so big? Usually goose eggs are much smaller than that.
समाधिBot: It’s kind of the storybook golden egg. I was thinking about that a lot while I was drawing it. It’s not realistic is it?
India: Mmm…
समाधिBot: But the goose is always sitting on a preposterously large golden egg.
India: Like the queen ant is always sitting there laying eggs.
समाधिBot: Have you ever drawn a goose?
India: Yes… a baby goose.
समाधिBot: Do you know what a baby goose is called?
India: … a gooseling?
समाधिBot: A gosling.
India: Bother…
समाधिBot: I once got chased by a goose. Ever been chased by a goose?
India: Is it scary?
समाधिBot: It is!
India: Well… they are big honking gooses…
समाधिBot: They lift their heads up high and spread their wings and hiss, and all of a sudden they go from being something not much different from a duck or a chicken… to this terrifying once-was-a-dinosaur thing chasing after you.
India: But I’ve been chased by a bull before, in India.
समाधिBot: Well that’s a lot scarier. How’d you get chased by a bull?
India: Remember? We got a bit too close. That was scary.
समाधिBot: I don’t think that was a bull though.
India: What was it?
समाधिBot: It was a cow. Yeah the bulls are like a ton of rippling muscle.
India: It went like this… remember?
समाधिBot: It was doing that thing with its hoof…
India: The hoofy thing?
समाधिBot: Mm-hmm. Do you know the story of the goose laying the golden egg?
India: Jack and the Beanstalk? Uh… yeah. I’ve seen that show before.
समाधिBot: Is there any other story of a goose laying a golden egg, or is Jack and the Beanstalk the only one?
India: I guess it’s the only one. There’s a Puss ’n Boots version of it, and there’s a mommy goose that’s the size of a house, or a Titanoboa. Early birds had teeth, daddy.
समाधिBot: Yeah?
India: Yeah. They just had tiny little nubbin teeth. And early birds looked like penguins.
समाधिBot: Really?!!
India: Yeah, rrreally big fluffy penguins.
समाधिBot: [Laughs] I thought early birds were dinosaurs.
India: They were, but they were big, fluffy looking penguins. [Makes crashing sounds like giant dino-penguin feet stomping] And there’s this kind with flippers.
समाधिBot: I wonder if that’s how the birds survived when other dinosaurs did not. Maybe there was some kind of… what’s the word…
India: Safety ground? A safe coral spot?
समाधिBot: An intervention! Maybe there was an intervention where they said, these other dinosaurs, the Spinosauruses and whatnot, things with spikes and clubs… we’re going to let them burn. But these big soft, fluffy penguin-like dinosaurs are just too cute to let get wiped out.
India: Oh by the way, they were this big. [gestures]
समाधिBot: About… four feet high?
India: Mm-hmm, that’s a really big fluffy penguin. The kind with flippers is only this big.
समाधिBot: You know if we could clone one of those big fluffy dino-penguins, we could make a lot of money…
India: Yeah… they’re really fluffy… they’re this fluffy —
समाधिBot: Wow, mostly fluff?
India: Yeah, the females can get to this fluffy.
समाधिBot: Really? Were they just adorably fluffy, or were they also cold blooded killers?
India: At that time they were just vegetarians. They were just curious, they would come here, eat a bit, go to another spot, eat a bit.
समाधिBot: That sounds nice…
India: Yeah. They didn’t really have to worry about swimming, because of all their fluff, it just made them float.
समाधिBot: Could they fly then?
India: Nope. At that time they could kind of fly if it got really windy, then they would just go up in the air —
समाधिBot: Like a tumbleweed!
India: Yeah, like a tumbleweed! Anyway, how did you draw the G into the goose?
समाधिBot: I drew the letter G very lightly first, and then I looked for a goose to draw around it. So I could see the body of a goose, mostly inside the letter G, and I could imagine the head of the goose at the end of the top of it.
India: Those big fluffy penguins, they had lonnng pointy beaks. Yeah like that…
समाधिBot: Was it a specific species of big fluffy penguins, or there were lots of different kinds?
India: It was two kinds of them. I don’t know the names of them, but I called the one that we were first talking about the tumbleweed. The next one is kind of skinny, so I call it the naked bird.
समाधिBot: The naked bird?
India: Yeah, it doesn’t really have many feathers. It just has big feathers it walks around in. They’re funny.
समाधिBot: Alright… penguin interview!
India: And goose.
समाधिBot: Oh yeah, goose.
